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3/19/24

GODZILLA x KONG Choco-lympics Candy Bar Showdown and Taste-Testing-O-Rama Death Match!

 


Well, here's something new: food reviews.  More of an "accidental food review," but hey, it' s a new Godzilla product.  If you haven't noticed, they have been marketing the newest Godzilla film a lot harder than the last one...which could be a good or bad thing.  But hey, like many folks, I haven't gone to a movie theater in a few years now, so I'm looking forward to it.  In the meantime...we have products! Candy bars, to be specific.  

First, the info:  these are 2.1 (oddly specific) ounce candy bars that are only found at FYE stores. I do not have one of these locally, but happened to be traveling, which was a lucky thing (mostly).  I hope you're sitting down, because these candy bars are five bucks apiece. Did you ever think you'd see the day when four candy bars would be twenty bucks plus tax? It boggles the mind.  They are produced by Brooklyn Born Chocolate, and distributed by the repugnantly-named "Get Your Geek On" from Canada (yep, they go from New Jersey to Canada, so they can be sent back to the States).  There are some other FYE exclusives that exist, including a Black Cherry Soda (which my official testers loved), hot sauce (wasn't interested), and Freeze-Dried Ice Cream, which the store hadn't received yet, probably because it's still deep within the Hollow Earth. 

This is the second time FYE has sold Godzilla candy bars (the first were pretty good, and larger even), but last time they weren't tied to any film.  So, nothing left to do but to divide them up after dinner and get the family's reaction! And, heeeeeere we go...

Godzilla Supercharged Bar
This would be a natural selection, in looking at the four on a store shelf, just from the wrapper alone.  This candy bar is: chocolate with 35% white chocolate and stone ground coffee beans. A word of warning though:  left in the car on a 65 degree day, it mostly melted.  I am sure this is due to the white chocolate content, and I therefore had no choice but to refrigerate it, where it reconstituted and obviously affected the experience.  
Upon opening the wrapper, you are met with a pretty strong coffee smell, but I have to say, the beans were finely ground, and it didn't taste strong at all.  In fact, non-coffee drinkers really liked it, which was a surprise to me.  Unfortunately, the chocolate itself had a weird consistency, but I believe it had a lot to do with partially melting and reforming.  So all in all, this test was a little skewed.  Was it good enough to buy again? Yes, especially if summer hadn't set in yet, and I could get to eat it faster.

Kong B.E.A.S.T. Bar
"Nevermind that most people don't understand the acronym yet, it's what we were told to name it, so we named it that." This candy bar is: dark chocolate covered peanut praline & raspberry pate de fruit. And you know what? It's going for "peanut butter and jelly," and it is exactly like a mild, gourmet version of that.  BIG word of warning, though, this candy bar completely and totally melted on a 65-degree day. I kid you not; it was vertical in the shopping bag, and when we got home, it was a literal bag of goo.  
Which is too bad.  After being refrigerated, it was still quite soft, but able to be divided up.  This is the richest of the four, and is a thin, crunchy praline layer, filled with the raspberry, under a chocolate coating.  It's very luxurious, and there's nothing else exactly like it among candy bars.  Personally, there's no way I could eat a whole one, but hey, the wrapper clearly says there are two servings here.  This was a big favorite among my group, so it gets the YES vote for possible re-purchase, if it's ever possible.

Shimo Sub Zero Destroyer Bar
Let's not discuss how my brain still wants me to call this thing "Shimu" (I have killer whales on the mind I guess), this candy bar is: dark chocolate, cacao nibs, & peppermint essence. But, much like the coffee in the Godzilla bar, the peppermint is much milder than you'd expect.  The dark chocolate is quite good, but the little cacao bits seem to be mostly on the back of the bar, and sort of fall everywhere, which was my only complaint.  Otherwise, this was my personal favorite of the group. I'd buy it again, if I found myself needing to buy a five dollar candy bar that is.

Skar King Shadow Titan Bar
And then there's this.  This of course would be the one that the foodie-types would navigate to, because it's the weirdest. This candy bar is, and I kid you not: molé blend, toffee, toasted almond & fleur de sel.  Points for creativity.
Now, there are no actual moles in this candy bar.  It is instead molé, a traditional Mexican sauce that is different everywhere you have it, and is known for a large amount of ingredients (sometimes even chocolate).  Fleur de Sel is simply sea salt, but a fancy and expensive one from France. So, right out of the chute we have quite a cosmopolitan candy bar! The flavor is...hard to describe.  The toffee bits add a little sweetness as you'd expect, but then there's a bitter aftertaste afterwards.  Nobody in my group liked this one at all, so this one's a loss.  

Still though, 3 out of 4 isn't bad. I'd recommend you try these for yourself, if you are in the area of an FYE.  Next time, we will discuss people who are obsessive enough to wash out and save candy bar wrappers, and who probably  need professional help.