The Things That I See (continued)

 We haven't done one of these in quite a while, and, well, even in Virus World, I keep seeing things.  So, let's jump right in.

First off, here is a cool dollhouse-scale miniature of the vintage Ideal Godzilla board game, which I bought from an Ebay seller who crafts these things.  It's very well-detailed, down to the tiny playing pieces in the opening. [Note that, when you start buying the same collectibles that you already own in a different scale, you are then in need of two things:  1)more storage space, and 2)therapy.]

Some gold old thrift-store Engrish.  What strikes me about this photo now is the weird and slightly cool globe thingy in front of the, er, lamp.  Now I wish I'd picked it up and examined it further.

Here is a cool sticker that was actually on a Kingston Trio album that I saw somewhere.  The fortune teller amuses me. "Wait, I see...regret.  No--you'll actually hate this; save your money!"

While we are talking about thrift-store LPs, here is one of those Stereo demonstration records.  These were really popular in the early 1960's, when hi-fi systems were being pushed on the hipsters of the day.  The pseudo-art deco-ness of the cover caught me eye.  I figured it would be fun to experience jet planes and thunderstorms indoors in my own home.  It wasn't.  At all.  The record was completely fried, which, as it turns out, really interferes with your enjoyment of horses randomly neighing.  I was about to toss it, when I saw the listing for side two, which contained disappointing horrors:

Firstly, track one was pigeons.  "In A Hayloft," but whatever, it's pigeons.  That's your lead track. You can open a widow in any large city and hear that.

Now, let your eye drop to track #6.  What was wrong with people back then? "Hey, you know what would be fun for all the groovy hep hi-fi bachelor pad swingin' sound systems? Pigs being massacred." (If you're morbidly curious, like I was:  it's a short track, that sounds exactly like a barn full of pigs, with some voices calling out numbers, followed by one or two ear-piercing squealing shrieks.)

And, for the youth of America, Amazon wants to sell you a wig that commemorates President Ben Franklin.  I mean, he's on money, so that's how you get the title, right?

Here's a sign that was in the restroom at my own work.  Okay, fine, I made this...

This is a colorfully-labeled package of hardware from a furniture kit.  I should've give you some sense of scale, but it was about the size of a burrito.  It's not just that the label looked like it was yelling at me...it's just that I don't like being told what to do.

A photo from an Ebay auction for vintage Mego dolls.  So, it strikes me that this was a, I don't know, mischievous way to pose them, by the seller?  Maybe it's just the nature of my own depraved mind, but it certainly doesn't help Batman's image any. 

So, you know those cheap portable video game systems, that they sell in drugstores, that are made to look like smaller versions of an old Game Gear, or a Wii U gamepad? They advertise hundreds of full-color games, and show photos of delightful clones of early NES games on their packaging.

  

News flash: they are terrible.  I got so desperate and bored on a trip last year, that I bought one, and I figured hey, at the very least, it would be good for a laugh.  Turns out, the laughing was done at my expense, because everything included was mind-numbingly stupid.  

Nothing pictured was included, and, to give you a critical review:  the gameplay fell slightly short of "LED watch game," while game design was slightly worse than that of, oh, "Nokia phone." Most were really weak shooting-type or matching games, but there were one or two fake platformers, such as this gem:  MAGIC JONY (no, it's not "Magic Tony;" that's the guy in the alley behind the drugstore.)  JONY was a flawed, wonky not-quite-platformer...but, why am I trying to describe it to you, when you can just read its gripping story?

Really, though...still better than the Sequel Trilogy.

Finally, in this age of ubiquitous and unrelenting video-conferencing, I leave you with one that will resonate with many of us.  I present to you, Thanos' most embarrassing moment, where he didn't quite end the meeting in time: