Coyote McCloud & Clara Peller - Where's The Beef? (1984)........and the death of novelty songs

 

This is one of those "you have to be a certain age" sorts of posts, but either way, if you don't know, at one time Wendy's was just behind McDonald's and Burger King in the Fast Food Wars, and wasn't the godawful, filthy roomful of non-food that it is now...especially post-COVID.

In that halcyon era of advertising, where some commercials finally attained the long-desired status of being mini-movies, sometimes even better than the programs they accompanied (imagine getting THAT excited about an ad on TV, actually waiting and trying to see it, and even recording it so you could see it again and show everyone), somebody had a brilliant idea; an idea that fit the mindset and timing of the early 1980's so well, it became a brief phenomenon, just like the fast-talking Micro Machines guy that was everywhere later, and it went like this:

There were of course other ads, such as the one where she is waiting in line at the fast-food restaurant, or driving like a maniac while her two friends slosh around in the back of the car (these are on YouTube as well), and they are equally good.  

It is at this point that something occurred which was such a completely normal happening back then, nobody ever thought twice about it.  When something was popular in the 1970's and 1980's (and even long before that), it meant that the eventual and unavoidable novelty song was on the way.

It's hard to comprehend this today, when nothing is funny at all anymore, and nothing can be, but--although the point of any of these things is to make money off of a popular trend--a real sense of whimsy and fun still often permeated such attempts.  Not only that, but also a sense that your audience was going to know what you were doing, and go right along with it (also impossible today).

Wikipedia says that novelty songs started at least as far back as the 1910s, and their article is interesting to read, just to see the various inspirations for some of these songs (some are surprising). In fact, it could be argued what exactly constitutes a novelty song, because I just realized I have been specifically thinking of songs that exploit a celebrity or event or thing, and that's merely one type. We won't go down that rabbit hole, or we will be here all day. I mean, is Weird Al's whole career novelty? I say no, that's actually the category of parody.  From a modern perspective, I can't see how "Yakety Yak" or "Splish Splash" or "Charlie Brown" are all novelty songs either...they are...just 1950's songs (love The Coasters though). Nor do I think of "Monster Mash" as anything but freaking awesome, and an institution.

My point is, it surprised nobody that things like "Snoopy vs. The Red Baron" or "Convoy" or "Disco Duck" or "Vanna, Pick Me A Letter" existed back then.  They just did; they mirrored the times ("Hey, WHEEL OF FORTUNE is a thing"). They were on the same shelves right next to the current "serious" singles that came out at the same time.  Some were practically expected, and many of them actually made the charts and were hits. (This is a good time to say, long live Dr. Demento!)

But back to Clara Peller.  For all my pontificating about these types of songs, is this one any good? Oh no, not at all (it's also jacked to oblivion--this is one record that was mixed hot, my friends), but it needs to be heard to be believed.  Coyote McCloud, by the way, was a DJ from Nashville who cut three 45s in his time, this one among them.  One interesting thing about this particular release is that Wendy's logo is all over it, which sort of subtracts points from its street credibility....then again, maybe that was the only way, legally.  Then again again, maybe they just hired him in order to create a novelty song, as some savvy (or shameless?) promotion.  We may never know.

One last thing:  without fail, what do you always get for a B-side when you have an artist, group, or project with only one song in existence, and no other material? An instrumental, of course.  Use the lyrics on back to sing along, and make your own version of this song.  Or, don't!

LINK:  Coyote McCloud & Clara Peller - Where's The Beef? (1984)

The Top Ten Rarest American Godzilla Comics

 

In 2026, there will have been 50 years of American Godzilla comics, which is hard to believe.  The list of unique titles is hovering at around 300 different ones as I type this (mostly because their publication has been kicked into ultra-overdrive in the last couple of years by a certain parent company).  Therefore, I thought it would be a good time to examine the very rarest & most obscure titles that exist.

This list will not look at variant covers, or we would be here all day.  Also, remember the old chestnut of "just because it's rare, doesn't mean it's super-valuable," although some of these are definitely exemptions to that rule.

Also, we will go in chronological order, because it makes better sense, since this isn't a price guide.  Don't forget as well that we have a complete guide to Godzilla comics maintained at this page, which is an ongoing, "living document" of a PDF that is a real pain to keep current these days.  But it's the only place on the entire Internet that all of this information is together.  

1) GODZILLA vs. MEGALON THEATRICAL COMIC (Cinema Shares International, 1976)

And what better place to start, than at the beginning? This 8.5 x 11 inch pulp comic was purchased by the thousands by participating theatre-owners and handed out at showings.  Not many were saved, though, and with the distinction of being the very first U.S. Godzilla comic, prices have skyrocketed over the last several years.  I hate that term "key," because everything becomes a "key," but this is the keyest key that there is.  You can see scans of the whole thing at our post here!

2) GODZILLA #1/#2/#3 [35-cent edition]

(Marvel, 1977)

Another first--the first variant covers, although it wasn't on purpose.  At the time that Marvel launched their incredibly-fun GODZILLA title, comic cover prices were about to be increased, from 30 to 35 cents.  As a test in certain areas, they went ahead and printed 35-cent versions of titles that were currently 30 cents everywhere else (the extremely-rare first issue of STAR WARS is a good example).  As a result, the first 3 issues of GODZILLA have 35-cent variants, and are all quite expensive.  Starting with #4's November 1977 issue, all titles were 35 cents.  If you are ever scrolling by auctions for the ubiquitous 1st issue, you might want to pause and double-check the cover price, because sometimes sellers might not know what they have!

3) DARK HORSE PREVIEW BOOK (Dark Horse, 1992)

Many collectors don't even know about this super-rare item that Dark Horse sent to retailers in 1992 (it's just a little bigger than 8.5 x 11 inches, because of the cover).  It contained 4-page, black-and-white previews of their current offerings, including Godzilla, although they had barely gotten off the ground with the big G.  You can see the relevant parts in this post!

4) SCREEN MONSTERS #4 [Trading Card Edition] 
(Zone Productions, 1993)

Here is another one that lots of people don't know about, and it came out simultaneously in two versions, the plain and the "Limited Trading Card Edition," which raised the price by four dollars and included a strip of four trading cards, making it a source for a rare Godzilla comic AND very rare Godzilla trading cards at the same time. You can see the cards at this post!

5) DARK HORSE INSIDER #42 (Dark Horse, June 1995)

Nobody thinks about it at the time, but these sorts of free, promotional comics that you can pick up at your local comic shop can later become quite scarce, because they are usually thrown away!

6) NEGATIVE BURN #18 (Caliber Press, Jan. 1995) / ART ADAMS' CREATURE FEATURES (Dark Horse TPB, Aug. 1996)

Flying under the radar, the NEGATIVE BURN issue includes a 4-page, black-and-white feature entitled "Trampling Tokyo," which features Adams illustrating lyrics written by Alan Moore! This feature was reprinted in full color in the CREATURE FEATURES trade paperback the following year (which includes more Godzilla content, too).

7) GODZILLA: THE IDW ERA (IDW, May 2014)

This cash-grab issue was meant to be a behind-the-scenes look at the prolific run that started in 2011, but sales were very poor, and most fans stayed away.  As such, if somebody figures this out someday, prices for this title will probably go up. 

8) SCOOBY-DOO TEAM-UP #22 (DC Comics, Mar. 2017)

The issue is a team-up with Frankenstein Jr. and The Impossibles, but the artists sneaked the Hanna-Barbera Godzilla into one big panel, along with two of the monsters from the Saturday morning GODZILLA cartoon! File under: "the most obscure Godzilla cameo of all time"?

9) LEGENDS OF THE MONSTERVERSE OMNIBUS (Legendary Comics, hardcover, 2024)

These are the sorts of things that fall through the cracks: this volume reprints all of the tie-in graphic novels for the various modern Kong and Godzilla movies, but it adds one new story found nowhere else, called "Godzilla: Fight Or Flight." 

10) GODZILLA vs. CTHULHU: A DEATH MAY DIE STORY (CMON Games/Guillotine Press, 2024)

Distributed only at San Diego Comic Con (in July of 2024), this full-sized comic was produced in very limited numbers, and buying the Godzilla miniature for the "Death May Die" game was the only way to get it.  I haven't even read it yet, as I just got my copy (which prompted this Top 10 list, by the way), but I do predict that going forward, this will remain one of the most valuable Godzilla comics, price-wise.

I hope you've enjoyed this look at the very rare, and in some cases, ridiculously obscure.  The growing list of Godzilla comics shows no signs of stopping, and it is currently being spammed hard: in this year alone, Toho is allowing Godzilla comics printed by IDW, Marvel, and DC, even all at the same time in some cases.....it is nuts.  If IDW was to finally go bankrupt, I would not be surprised at all to see Toho--who is diversifying quite a bit these days--just print their own.  Godzilla comics are not going anywhere!

Vintage GODZILLA KING OF THE MONSTERS child's belt (c.1982)

 

We got a good one today--it's not very often that a "new" discovery is made, but today is one of those days!  Now, one caviat here, before we get started:  this item came to me from British Columbia, Canada, and our Guide To Vintage American Godzilla Items has always been limited solely to the United States up until now.  However, I am going to assume for educational purposes that this item could've easily been available down here as well (but I will note its provenance in the guide, just to be clear).  

Remember when kids' belts were cool? Immediately, I think of Sears department stores, which then makes me think of the "Toughskins" brand. And speaking of Sears, that is exactly where the seller thinks this belt came from.  He knew he had it in 1982, so that is the closest date we have for it.  It is a 22-24 inch size, and strangely, has no manufacturer anywhere (it is possible it was printed on the inside, like the size information, and simply rubbed off, but I see no trace anywhere):

The belt is made of blue leather, and measures 28 inches long, including the buckle.  It features 3 "Godzilla King of the Monsters" logos--matching the title logo of the 1956 American film--and 4 scenes of super-cool artwork, which we will look at now:

The first one shows Godzilla destroying electrical towers, right out of the first movie.

Next, we have Godzilla just about to melt tanks...again, right out of the first film...

...continued by a scene of Godzilla fighting both tanks and jets!

Then we get a curve ball that I never expected--Godzilla roasting Kumonga (or Spiga in the U.S. dub) from SON OF GODZILLA! That was a very cool addition.

And there you have it: quite simply the coolest kids' belt ever made in the history of the world.  I am thrilled with this find.  I had my share of Star Wars, superhero, and Pac-Man belts, but never knew this was even a remote possibility! 

So, did you have one? Have you ever even seen one? Did they come in any other colors? If anyone has any additional information, please let me know!

To conclude, here are some of the seller's photos (he had better lighting than me), so enjoy!