Halley's Comet: The Complete Adventure (PAM, 1985)

 

Turns out, the COMPLETE ADVENTURE is a postage stamp's worth of information, and synthesizers.

Some records can be very rare AND a huge disappointment, all at the same time.  But first, a little story.  

When I was a kid, I took educational summer classes for a summer or two (they were trying to get me out of the house, obviously).  You were allowed to choose from a short list of topics, at least, and small me chose "photography" (skills and knowledge which, of course, are now completely worthless for me, in modern times), "the abacus" (big mistake...completely forgot I hated math...also, extremely obsolete, even then), and a thing called "Halley's Comet."  There was a big hoopla about it returning the following year.  It only was visible every 76 years, and people generally got one shot at seeing it in their lifetimes.  It was going to be a big deal and change life as we knew it.  

The short answer was:  it was a huge dud.  In fact, even Wikipedia says that 1986 was the worst appearance of the comet in the history of the universe, because of lots of factors.  It was pretty much a waste of time, from the ground anyway.

This record is part of that excitement built up around the event, and as previously stated, it's also a huge disappointment, much like the comet itself.  There is hardly a postcard's worth of information on Side One, which is spaced out (pun not intended) a sentence at a time, and intoned creepily over a synthesizer soundtrack that goes wildly all over the place, from "fanfare," to quiet, to loud, to everything in between, like it was composed to accompany something else entirely, and then got used for this.  So much so that the entirety of Side Two is the synthesizer score again, this time by itself...because we have nothing else to say about the comet, anyway.  [This is random, but it reminds me of the English dubs of ULTRA 7 that used to air on TNT, which also added a hyperactive synthesizer score, which actually detracted from the show you were trying to watch.  Just in case anyone else had that same experience!]

What they should have done was make a record of angry people's comments who fell for the hype, and yet never saw the actual Halley's Comet at all.  That would've been far more interesting to hear.

Halley's Comet: The Complete Adventure

P.S.:  Oh, and the record actually came with a "Star Tracker" dial thingy, which was actually well-made.  It has much more information than the actual recording itself.  I can only assume this record was sold in science museums, because there is no bar code, and I imagine selling this in an actual record store would've caused looting and riots.

Official Universal Movie Monsters (Remco, 1979) PART TWO

 

Picking up from where we left off last time, here is the Remco Wolf Man (or "Wolfman" as it says on the packaging, even though it was two words in the title of the 1941 Lon Chaney film).

His chest is molded in brown, because they know it's going to show under his clothes.  The "rope" belt tends to fray badly.  Thank goodness I never tried to untie it, as lots of kids managed to.  Speaking of, ever since I was a kid, I always thought my figure had some sort of painting error with the eyes, but in recent years (thanks, internet) I've discovered that's not the case, and they are all like that.  In Remco's depiction, they seem to be going for one of the promotional photos that show Chaney looking to one side.

Lastly, The Mummy, whose bandages are portrayed via printing on the fabric, which actually works quite well.  

Here you see the button that allows the "Monster-Crush Action" to work! What you can't see is that the arms are slightly scalloped, allowing them to move like that.  Here is a photo of a naked Dracula (hide the children!) from a previous Ebay auction that shows this:

[for educational purposes only]

As promised, we conclude with the very rare, free pack-in items that were included with these figures.  There were actually two possibilities during the production of these figures: an iron-on patch of the monster in question or a glow-in-the-dark ring featuring a skull and crossbones.  Although a Frankenstein's Monster patch does indeed exist, my figure came with the ring, which now that I think about it, is really pretty lucky.  Even more lucky is the fact that I somehow didn't destroy it in trying to wear it as a kid!

The back of the patch, which you never see.  As I'm sure you can imagine, most of these patches didn't survive the 70's!

 

By the way, you've probably already read Part One of this post, but you might want to go back and look at a couple of photos I just added of a boxed example of the rare Monsterizer that appeared on Ebay fortuitously this week! It's pretty awesome, and you can have it for the price of a used car!

Official Universal Movie Monsters (Remco, 1979) PART ONE

 

In 1979, Remco issued Universal Monsters figures in two scales.  One was the 3.75-inch, 5-points-of-articulation variety, very much like Kenner's flagship Star Wars line.  These came in regular and glow-in-the-dark variety, and fit right in with your Star Wars/Adventure People...adventures.  These were super-cool in their own right, and we will cover them another day.

Today, however, we are interested in the second variety, which were 9-inch figures in cloth outfits, more akin to Mego's World's Greatest Superheroes line.  These had hands and faces that glowed in the dark, and included a cool and ingenious action feature that allowed their raised arms to grasp (or crush) their prey, by pushing down on a hidden button in their backs.  This is named "Monster-Crush Action" on the back of their boxes!

I am lucky enough to have my originals from childhood.  I've said this before around here, but the big Universal monster fan in my house was actually my mother, and she is the reason I have these things, and that they survived! There were actually six figures produced.  I never had the other two--Phantom of the Opera and the Creature From the Black Lagoon--but unfortunately, neither did most kids.  They were later additions, I believe, and were rare even back then, and as such are mega-rare today.  I know my own mom loved the Wish Book Christmas catalog sets and multi-packs for their convenience, and I'm sure that the original four must have been available that way.

First up, in no particular order, is the Frankenstein Monster.  (Points to Remco for adding the small "Monster" under FRANKENSTEIN on the box.)  In short, they couldn't have done a better job.  You can't really see this in the photos, but he even has an olive green shirt under his jacket.  

He has just the right amount of menace, and big clunky boots to complete the look.

Also, the grasping action feature seems to be the very best-suited for him.  Both of Remco's lines had a special accessory that was most suited to the Frankenstein Monster, which we will see momentarily.

Next up is Dracula.  He is sort of the deluxe figure of the group, because he has a fancy, two-sided cape, and a printed undershirt, which is kind of a clever way to depict extra details.

I was never a huge fan of his face, but then again, this was back in the days when the legalities of using the Lugosi likeness weren't worked out.  He's just a little bit too cartoony.  He has the only human face in the line, which may have something to do with it.

His cape is held to his wrists by two elastic loops, which is a nice touch but hinders the posability a bit.

We will look at the last two figures next time, but right now, let's take a look at the awesome MONSTERIZER, which was an accessory as well as a playset!

This awesome piece of equipment condenses the whole Frankenstein lab into one piece! I mean, look at this thing.  Glow-in-the-dark poles, wires and gauges...it's the perfect addition to the line (there was a four-inch scale version of it too)!

When you turned the crank, it made an ominous and spooky sound, causing the platform to extend and the cage to open.  You would then use the restraints to hold down the monster of your choice.

Turning the crank the other way slid your figure into the machine, as the top came down.  Then the fun began--holding down the large black button caused grinding electrical sounds to be heard, as the bight, flashing light did its work of energizing the monster of your choice with its power! The lightening was harnessed, and you were tampering in God's domain.

Of course, this was a super-fun way to utilize the glow-in-the-dark features as well, which meant you could use it on any of the figures!

Although these are quite rare, a boxed example actually turned up on Ebay this very week, and I can't resist sharing what the mega-rare box looked like.  Note the prototype used for the photos too, which is fun:

Seeing a Service Merchandise price tag makes my squeal with excitement, in ways the 21st century just can't supply.  Do I need professional help?

Next time, we will look at my other two figures, as well as some special (and very valuable) pack-in bonuses that were included with them!

Hanna-Barbera 1978-79 Promotional Piece (HB Enterprises, 1978)

 

This is an 8.5 x 11" glossy cardstock, which shows new additions to Hanna-Barbera's Saturday morning lineup for the 1978-1979 year.  The person I bought it from said it would've probably been part of a press kit, that would've included other items, such as this Godzilla transparency that pops up from time to time:

This and the image on the promotional card were both very commonly used for ads and articles about the GODZILLA show at the time, so it makes sense.

Play a little game and take a look at the other shows on the card, though.  You may hear the name JANA OF THE JUNGLE sometimes (but only because it was  marketed with GODZILLA at the start as one continuous "hour" of programming as THE GODZILLA POWER HOUR), nothing else has stood the test of time.  We all know who Yogi Bear is, and if I remember right, the SPACE RACE thing was continuing in the direction of LAFF-A-LYMPICS after Star Wars had happened.    

Magnetic System - Godzilla (Record Store Day, 2020)

 

Here is some rare Godzilla-related audio with an interesting connection.  You may or may not know about one of the rarest versions of the first Godzilla movie that exists--well, specifically, it's a version of the U.S. version--that was made in Italy in 1977.

Italian director Luigi Cozzi has had a long career, and so-bad-it's-good film fans will know certain parts of his work, which includes infamous items like STARCRASH and THE HUMANOID (both recommended).  In 1977 he added WWII footage and synthesizers to his own edit of KING OF THE MONSTERS.  If that were the extent of it, we would still have a unique and compelling version of the film, but instead he went the extra mile and attempted to colorize it.  Now, by "colorize" I don't mean the dreadful experiments that Ted Turner was a proponent of, but, instead, more like a psychedelic backdrop to a rock concert.  In fact, it was done exactly the same way, with gels.  The result is very trippy; each scene of the film involving humans is cast in yellows or orange, while outdoor scenes are often red.  The underwater scenes have deep blues and greens.  Sometimes they phase into each other somewhat, like a cathode ray tube that's going out.

Godzilla fans are divided over the finished product, and refer to it as "Cozzilla."  Some hate the very sight of it, and some are entranced.  I fall mostly into the latter camp; I don't think that lots of the extra (sometimes gruesome) war footage was really needed, though; I can understand being a purist about it, but the reality is, the original GOJIRA is so good, it's usually unaffected by edits and still shines through.  I mean, show a Godzilla detractor (or somebody who poo-poos monster movies in general) KING OF THE MONSTERS.  Anyone whose brain stem hasn't become completely detached will have to admit to you that it's good.

I should also state at this point that the film was a big success in Italy.  AND, you can even see the whole thing--subtitled even--on YouTube (which is kind of amazing, because Toho apparently loathes this version).  Unfortunately it's from a VHS copy of a TV airing, but since we are beggars, we cannot be choosers here:

And now, back to the synthesizers.  Three musicians (including one who did lots of scores for Cozzi), under the name Magnetic System, recorded the soundtrack for the film, and two tracks were issued on a single in Italy.  This record is quite rare and expensive today, so a replica was issued a few years ago for Record Store Day, which is kind of shocking if you think too hard about it.  Both tracks are super cool, and there may or may not be a lossless rip (and also mp3) of them at the link below:

Magnetic System - Godzilla

Dark Horse Preview Book (Dark Horse Comics, 1992)

 

In 1992, Dark Horse sent out a preview book to retailers, and inadvertently created one of the rarest Godzilla comics that exists.  It's virtually unknown on many lists and databases, but here is the lowdown.

The book itself is unique; it's black and white with pages that are 8.5 x 11-inches, but the oversized outer cover adds an 1/8 of an inch all the way around, meaning it won't fit into any standard magazine bags.  Inside are 4-page previews of all of their titles for 1992, meaning the Arthur Adams GODZILLA COLOR SPECIAL for our purposes here, because that's the only Godzilla item Dark Horse made that year (other than a pin-up in a comic distributed at San Diego Comic Con that year, which we will see in a moment).

Apologies for the photos; the weird binding makes it so that it would have to be destroyed to get decent scans of, so this was unfortunately the only way:

The artwork above was used as the cover to the GODZILLA COLOR SPECIAL that year.

And here is the pin-up that ended up in SAN DIEGO COMIC CON COMICS #1 (which I believe was given out for free at that show, even).

Is anything FREE at a Comic Con? Ever?

This preview book is an interesting footnote in the Dark Horse Godzilla output, which lasted from 1987 to 1999! To see a checklist of all of it, consult our Chronological American Godzilla Comics page.  A PDF guide showing every cover is in the works as we speak, so stay tuned!