7/10/15

THE SUPER DICTIONARY (Part Six)

It was a perfectly good Friday, and then somebody had to go and drag out THE SUPER DICTIONARY.  How many times have you heard that one?  Well, actually ZERO, and I haven't either...but I did go and drag out THE SUPER DICTONARY...
This picture is amusing by itself, but it's twice as funny to me because it reminds me of two memes combined:

And also--in keeping with the usual subject matter at this blog--because of the Ultraman Ace episode where Yuko, formerly half of Ultraman Ace, leaves suddenly after a battle, revealing herself to be the daughter of the King of the Moon, literally embodying both of the above memes at the same time.
Also, Supergirl is aiming for the sun...
But I digress...
Uh-oh, this seems to be a continuation of the confrontation between A&W Man (told you he would be back) and Green Lantern...I can't yet say whether this continues, as I still have a couple of letters to go in reading THE SUPER DICTIONARY (ie "taking one for the team"), but I'll let you know.
Also, why are Green Arrow and Black Canary lying rigid behind the hedge?  Were they wanting alone-time, and were interrupted? Are they dead at A&W Man's hands?  Is laying on your longbow ever comfortable? If you squint, it looks like they are being carried downstream by a sea-green river.
Sigh.  THE SUPER DICTIONARY is full of stupid people.  WHY is our hip young friend encountering a lion?  And WHY is jumping into purple water a deterrent to an angry lion? It's not the Human Torch.  And also, SUPER DICTIONARY, I'm no animalologist by trade, but I do know that a lion is not a "large cat-like animal," it's a LARGE CAT.  So there.
One of the lamest people in the SUPER DICTIONARY is Firehair, without a doubt, but I think he is also Elongated Man without his shirt.  Look at his looooooooong arm in this "artwork."  Click on it.  Look at it full screen.  Nobody looks like that.
Oh really, Supergirl?  How does it feel to have somebody asking you rapid-fire insane questions?  You can dish it out, but you can't take it.  Also, you have changed your costume yet again.  Also, where in the name of all that is holy even ARE you?  Dr. Seuss' codeine flashbacks? Also, don't look now, but I think that turtle...thing beside you is dead.  Quite dead.  Impaled on that red thing with several large shards of something.
"But I'm not necessarily a master at throwing bombs..."
I'd like to point out two things about this little vignette.  First, notice that Batman is bragging what a world class catcher-of-persons he is, and in doing so, he let the Joker run much farther away.  I'm just saying.  Secondly, take note of the second half of the picture:
It seems that leaping through explosions has damaged Batman's pants, and exposed his Bat-briefs.  I can't believe I just typed that, but I just read it again, and I typed that.  I really did.
Wait a second.  Nevermind the fact that Batman is suddenly Elongated Man, and is a little scarily tall. Nevermind the fact that he has no arms suddenly.  We just got through hearing what a master criminal catcher he was, and he says to the Joker "You're dismissed"?!?!?

Who needs to say anything? This stuff speaks for itself, folks...
Ok, I was prepared to go on a world-class tirade about how there is no such thing as "Aquababy," but, with the whole Internets in front of me, I decided to research it, and found this:
So yeah, it IS a thing...even though in the picture, it shows a very large child (or 20-year-old man, I have no idea).  Aquaman's wife had her entire life plus nine months to think of a name, and this lummox is still wandering around somewhere being called "Aquababy."  I mean, go buy a baby name book or something.  It's not that hard, DC.
What you can't see in the picture is about a billion white men, storming over the hillside, just behind the balloon....and speaking of, this speech balloon is just free-floating.  It doesn't point to anyone.  Is this being heard telepathically? And where did Mowgli come from, all of the sudden?
Who says that? SUPER DICTIONARY, you cause me pain.  And look at Robin, he's all like "I'm going to climb in this teeny, tiny car!"
And, speaking of pain, I have to stop now, for my own personal safety.

TO BE CONTINUED...

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